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The Great Indoors: Part 9

It’s an up-and-down relationship we have, Summer and I. On one hand, I appreciate not getting trapped in blinding blizzards, but Summer gets a little carried away with cranking up the heat. I love going to the beach and having barbeques, but then I get attacked by wandering bees or ants or some other bug. I hate bugs.

So, relationship status? It’s complicated.

Asana math sample 

Pictured: Something complicated...I think. Let's see, pi equals sigma...

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Asana-math-sample.png

 

Welcome, once again, to “The Great Indoors,” where I endeavor to make your relationship with Summer as simple as possible by letting you know about activities you and your friends can do away from the judgmental gaze of the sun.

Sun face 

Yeah it looks all happy and innocent, but really, it’s judging you, and it’s unimpressed.

http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/hledej.php?hleda=sun+face

Today’s exhibit of interest: Indoor skydiving.

Sky Diving 

Indoor skydiving, minus the indoor part. Clearly, they're doing it wrong.

https://pixabay.com/en/photos/skydiving/

Okay, so if the picture didn’t give it away, then skydiving is a very simple activity: you jump from a very high place (like a plane) and dive through the sky. As you near the bottom, you open up your parachute so that you don’t become jelly. I think it goes without saying, you should probably skip this one if you’re afraid of heights.

Small hill above Llanfairfechan 

If this hill is making you nervous, man...this is not for you.

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Small_hill_above_Llanfairfechan_-_geograph.org.uk_-_151508.jpg

Basically, indoor skydiving involves rocking a windproof jacket and being in a chamber with a giant floor fan. The fan creates a vertical wind tunnel effect that keeps you hovering in the air, simulating the sensation of slowly descending, with the wind whipping past you, without needing a plane to start from, or worrying about the hard ground that would normally await you at the bottom.

Paratrooper 

Plus, it removes the “thrill” of possible parachute malfunctions!

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:USMC_Paratrooper.jpg

It’s a great deal of fun for the adventurous soul, but the biggest boon to the indoor version is the price tag. Outdoor skydive? $300 (courtesy of skydivetoronto.com), and that’s no video or pictures. Indoor version? A quarter of that price, though it depends on the place and how many times you “jump” (courtesy of iflytoronto.com). It also can act as an introduction to outdoor skydiving, in case you’ve always been interested in it but aren’t willing to invest in the outdoor version, or, like me, you’d rather not roast in the sun as you’re falling. Most facilities also offer lessons.

Want to see more? Here’s a video of a skydiving lesson in action.

Here’s a few places you can check out:

I fly Toronto: https://www.iflytoronto.com/

Niagara Skydive Centre: http://www.niagaraskydive.com/

Go ahead and dive right in! (Hahaha, I made a pun! Get it? Okay, don’t worry the article’s almost over…)

Thanks for reading, I’m Nathaniel Keefer! Join me next time for another bit of fun without the sun!